{Day 19} Letting Go of Expectations

Today I want to focus on letting go of our expectations, especially when it relates to raising our kids. To clarify, I guess I should say letting go of our HIGH expectations or unrealistic expectations, or simply learning to go with the flow.

This is something that does NOT come easy for me. In fact, I still struggle with it even now that the girls are getting older. I am a perfectionist in many ways and I am also very controlling and want things to go my way.

When it comes to raising kids, this has caused me bunches and bunches of angst. When I think about how many times I planned an outing for the day, had the girls’ clothes all lined up, has everything all arranged the way I wanted it to go – then one of the kids would mess it up by throwing a tantrum or not cooperating or being tired and grumpy – it makes me sad that I was so focused on my own agenda instead of the needs of my kids.

I mean, would it really have killed me to change my plans for the day and stayed home so my kids could have a little more rest time like they probably needed at the time? NO! But I was always focused on MY expectations and what I wanted to do or how I wanted them to act.

What I wished I knew then was to just let it go. To choose to go with the flow and focus on my kids needs and stop worrying about my own silly plans. Another example of this is the whole picture taking thing. There were times I took the girls to have portraits taken and for whatever reason they didn’t cooperate the way I wanted them to. I remember being so mad and frustrated about the fact that we weren’t able to get those ‘perfect’ pictures that I wanted to get.

Now please let me clear one thing up – I am NOT suggesting that you let things go when it comes to discipline or danger. I would never ‘let something go’ if it meant that my child was disobeying or being disrespectful or especially if they were putting themself in harms way. Those things MUST be dealt with immediately and not let go.

But for me, it was always those silly little things that I got caught up on and would stress over. Right now my 10 year old has this funky, weird sense of fashion. Sometimes I’m sort of embarrassed to head out of the house with her! {I know that’s a horrible thing to admit as a Mom!}. But then I think about what is REALLY important. First, it’s important that she be modest – which she is. Second, it’s important that she have confidence in who SHE is and feel comfortable and accepted in HER sense of style {not mine!}. So I am learning to LET IT GO! When she’s an adult, I hope that she will have good, Godly character and those are the things I want to focus on – not what her hair or clothes look like.

{just for fun, so you get the idea - this is a typical day with the crazy colors and patterns and mismatched socks!} {can we say 80’s people??!!}

 

So today’s challenge is:

What things are you getting hung up on? What do you need to let go of? Do you think you could find more joy in your parenting if you were willing to let go of some of your super high expectations? Would you be willing to put your child’s needs and best interest ahead of your plans for the day? Take some time to think about these things and pray through them if you have some issues you need to resolve.

PS. Have you checked out the other 31 dayers yet?? You should! Click here!

P.P.S. Don’t forget about my giveaway!! Click here to enter, you only have until Friday at midnight!