{Day 10} Play Together!

Hello friends! Happy Columbus Day to my American friends and family and Happy Thanksgiving to my Canadian friends and family! {Bet ya didn’t know that I am half Canadian - was born in Canada and lived there till I was 14, huh?}

Today we’re going to continue talking about ways to become a joyful wife. For those of you who would rather hear about being a joyful Mother, don't worry, I WILL get to those posts. But I honestly feel that our priorities need to be 1. God 2. Spouse and then 3. Kids. Sorry if that doesn’t seem right to anyone because they feel they’re kids should be number 1, but honestly that is the plan that God wants us to follow. So we’ll continue with building that joyful relationship with our spouse first, then get to the posts on mothering.

Let’s talk about playing together. And no, I don't mean the intimacy type stuff, we already went over that, right?! I mean like hobbies and having fun doing stuff together. It’s so easy to get into ruts in our marriages, isn’t it? I mean we’ve all got bills to pay, houses to take care of, jobs to go to, kids to raise, responsibilities galore and the list goes on and on. If we don’t throw a little fun in there sometimes it can feel like life is just one big long chore.

{hiking}

{archery}

What are some fun things we did BEFORE we had kids?

*going on cruises

*hiking, biking, camping

*skiing – both water and snow

*celebrating holidays with BBQ’s with friends or family

*boating/going to the beach

*playing board games together

*going on vacations

We basically did almost everything together. We both had full time jobs, and for a long time even had weird hours like 8pm-4am – but one thing we did is we always tried to be on the same or similar shift as each other and also tried to have the same days off as each other. Sometimes that meant we had Tuesdays and Wednesdays off, but that was OK as long as we both had those days off. So on our time off or on those days when we worked late at night, we would spent our time doing things together. On our ‘weekend’ we’d take spontaneous trips to go skiing in winter or camping in summer. {Obviously we had more money to spare then with two incomes and no kids!}

{hiking}

{beach / boogie boarding}

Now that we have kids things have definitely changed – but the biggest thing is the finances, NOT the time spent doing things together. We STILL do a lot of those same things together, just maybe a little less, with a little more planning and obviously a little different with kids.

{running/walking a 5k together}

{beach and fishing}

I realize that budgets are a HUGE factor in taking cruises, vacations and ski trips – like I said, our trips have been cut back a lot since our pre-kid days. But we still find ways to do fun things together. Some things we do WITH our kids, teaching them to love camping, hiking, biking and things like that. And other times we do things just the two of us – like hiking to the top of a mountain while my in laws watched the girls {which happens to be FREE in case you’re wondering, and even though it’s hard work, it’s an AMAZING experience!} We also still love the beach and go as often as we can in the summer – also FREE! Our kids now love the beach as much as we do. This summer one of my favorite little ‘dates’ Bob and I went on was an afternoon when the girls were at Grandma’s house and Bob spontaneously asked me if I wanted to go to the beach with him. So I put all my chores aside and we went. We had a really nice, relaxing time together and even got ice cream on the way home! A cheap, fun, date together.

{mini golf}

{vacation to Myrtle Beach}

{rollerblading}

{camping, playing board games}

Now, I have to add here that Bob and I also do things separate at times, and that’s OK. He will usually go skiing or golfing with his friends a few times a year and I have also gone on weekends away without him like when I went to a Ladies Retreat at Camp, or to Women of Faith or to a scrapbook weekend with my girlfriends. It’s OK to do some hobbies and activities separate from each other. You need to have space at times and it’s fine if your hubby doesn’t enjoy scrapbooking and you don't enjoy golf! BUT, just don’t forget to plan some fun things that you DO together as well.

{walking on the beach/fishing}

{hiking in New Hampshire}

 

{campfires with friends}

{sunset picnics at the beach}

{watching the fireworks together}

Today’s challenge is:

What have you done with your spouse lately? I mean, besides washing dishes or raking the yard or going to church? Do you have any fun things you USED to do before you had kids? What would it take to make those things happen again? Could you do them with a lower budget, or by finding someone to watch your kids, or maybe even something where you could take the kids along? Make a list of some fun hobbies or activities that you and your husband would like to do and then start planning how you can make them happen! I realize some things I mentioned are very costly, like cruising, but there are also a million things you can do for low or no cost – think about things involving nature – pretty much always free! The important thing is to have FUN together – as a couple and as a family!

Please check out the other 31 dayers here.