OK friends, I'm having a dilemma and just need some advice. First, let me preface this by saying this is clearly not an earth-shattering matter, nor is it of ANY importance when you think of all that is going on in the world today. It's just a silly little thing in my little family and I figured I'd ask some advice. OK? Glad you all know me well enough to know that I know what's important and what's not. LOL
Anyhow ... my youngest daughter has been trying to grow her hair out. For some reason she loves the idea of wearing it long. The problem is, she doesn't take care of it! She hates brushing it and it gets really knotty and then she has to ask me to brush it for her EVERY day. Then a couple hours later it's looking ratty again. It's been a constant battle here in our home lately!
We've been trying to convince her to cut it. When it's shorter, like in a cute bob, it's SO easy to take care of and she can brush it herself every day. We've even tried bribing her to get it cut. {I know, parents of the year, huh?!} She almost agrees to the bribe, but then starts crying and saying she doesn't want to cut it.
I don't want to force her. I'm afraid she'll cry and be mad about it it we make her. But I'm really getting frustrated by it lately.
I also keep thinking that she will only be this young once and some day I might miss getting to brush her hair for her - then I feel guilty and think I need to suck it up and stop complaining. But it's so not enjoyable for me to fight with her about taking care of her hair lately!
Oh, I forgot to mention, she sticks the ends of it IN HER MOUTH and sucks on it - it's SO gross and gets all sticky and yucky and I keep threatening her that if I keep seeing it in her mouth I'm going to cut it shorter {so it won't reach} ... but so far I haven't followed through with that. Mostly because every time I say 'I caught you, I'm getting my scissors out!' she starts crying.
So, please help! What would you do?
7 comments:
Hmm, not sure what I would do... I would definitely try to enjoy brushing her hair because that's going to be such sweet memories for her, and it obviously means a lot to her. Perhaps try different styles with it--braids, clips, headbands. If she STILL wants to suck on her hair so be it. It's not worth crushing her if she really wants it long! Just some thoughts??
P.S. Letting her make choices about things that don't REALLY matter is so important!
I was actually just giving Eli a haircut 2 days ago and he didn't like the style of the picture I'd printed off, so I intentionally kept it closer to what I know he likes. Their preferences matter.
Well we have opposite issues but I understand your frustration. I would def let her grow it out but have a rule that she MUST wear it up. Pull the sides away from her face so she can't get those ends in her mouth. Once it's long enough, keep it in braids. That's how V wore her hair and it minimizes tangles. Also there is a product by Johnson's Kids called "no more tangles". It's a detangling spray that you can put in wet or dry hair and it's great! I have a bottle actually and can give it to you since my V's hair is so short right now and won't need it! Email me if you want me to give it to Robin to pass on to ya. Lastly, I would write up a contract with her. Tell her she can grow out her hair IF she agrees to the terms on the paper. Both of you sign it. Good luck and let us know what you decide!
I have the exact problem with Haley. I actually did cut her hair once for sucking on it and not taking care of it. Our deal is that it needs to be brushed and out of her face and mouth for her to keep it long. Since I have followed through before, she usually listens. I do have to remind her sometimes and I do end up brushing her hair occasionally. I agree with Mary about the detangler. It's a big help.
Kathy...i would let her keep it long...my suggestion would be to use a really good conditioner in her hair to keep it from tangling, and then until she is more responsible, keep it braided or in pony tails...there are so many cute ways to keep it braided...I just know that I resented it so much when my mom made me get mine cut when i was younger. Darcie
Hi Kathy ~ My girls need to keep longer hair due to needing to put it in a ballet bun at least a couple times a week.
Long hair is not easy but, having them keep it in a pony tail or braid is much neater.
We recently cut Emma's and I was so glad b/c it was always getting so tangled and broken from so many pony tail holders, etc. But she wanted hers cut.
Maybe this could be a great lesson in responsibility. It's a privilege to have hair, especially long hair (since some people can't), so it's also a responsibility, right? If you could get her to take some responsibility for helping care for her hair better in order to keep it long maybe it would motivate her.
Or you can just say "it'll grow back" and cut it:)
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